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What I Believe Women Love About Fifty Shades of Grey

If you follow Fifty Shades of Grey on Facebook, then you know it will be another year before the next release in the prequel will be shown in theaters. I am bummed about this because I had been hearing that it would be a year after Fifty Shades of Grey was released. Now I have to anxiously await another year. I seriously hope that they are making it much more intense than the first since they are making us wait this long.

Last year we did a fun little photo shoot for the release of the Fifty Shades Wine. You might remember that from our Instagram:


That was fun.

I wanted to discuss my belief in why women love Fifty Shades of Grey (and men, too) and the main character, the enigmatic Christian Grey. For the most part, I believe people enjoyed the series and highly anticipated the movie, which seemed to be a little disappointing. I will even admit that I was disappointed as well. Perhaps that is why there was a feud over who would be directing the next one and all that. I don’t know. 

I have heard accusations from those who didn’t like the books, stating they felt they were putting BDSM in a bad light and that the relationship between Ana and Christian was abusive. Well, I am not going to delve into the BDSM world, but overall it is a lifestyle in which people enjoy upon giving consent to others to act out their desires or fantasies. Some of that involves pain, but once again, that is only done with permission. I don’t feel that Christian’s character strayed from that. After all, there was a lengthy contract which spelled it all out and was discussed in a large portion of the first book. Maybe those people missed that part.

I believe that the story was about a couple whose paths crossed and in that, there was some inexplicable force drawing them to each other…like the energy changed between them and they couldn’t function properly around one another. To me, that’s when you know you have found someone who is a soul mate. Simply being in their presence affects you to your core. We saw this between Ana and Christian.

The development of their relationship was not going to be normal as Christian’s private life began to unfold. Sure, he was handsome and successful, but the package also came with some really freaky quirks. Ana was a strong woman, holding onto her morals as tightly as she could, but even she couldn’t resist that energetic pull. I believe that a part of her wanted to be able to “fix” Christian when she realized a part of him was “broken.” Don’t a lot of us women do that? We find men who are “broken” or we want to fix their “broken” parts. I believe it is innate for us to want to nurture the people we love, including our mate.

As their relationship transpires, they each begin to lose themselves. Perhaps they are really finding themselves. Ana begins to surrender to Christian and his controlling ways, allowing him to have his way with her – with limitations. Christian starts to have feelings for Ana, which he tries so hard to keep at bay for fear of losing himself. “I practice control in all things, Ms. Steele,” becomes words that no longer ring true. 

They learn how to give in to their weaknesses and it eventually strengthens their relationship, but not before testing them.

I believe the biggest part that draws us into the story ARE the kinky parts. What women really desire in a sexual relationship is a man who knows his way around the bedroom. We want a man who doesn’t need to be directed or told what to do to please us. That is what makes Christian Grey so desirable is that he knows exactly what to do to create a spicy life in the bedroom…or on the piano…or wherever. He keeps it interesting.


Wendy is a facebook administrator and editor for Modern Day Moms. She is a multi-purpose mom (aren’t we all, really?) who loves home decor, couponing, sewing, photography, Pinterest, frugal living… ok, pretty much all the same things that most women love! She enjoys spending time with her family and friends while living on the gulf coast. Her two Boston Terriers - Oscar and Lily - occasionally make appearances on MDM.



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