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Advice Moms Motherhood Parenting

The Thread That Binds Us

“The Evil Twins” that’s what I’ve nicknamed my boobs and for good reason. Let’s just say my adventures in breastfeeding have been just that, a wild adventure. There have been good moments but mostly horrendous ones and I’m here to share my story.

To sum things up for you lets just say breast implants, a tongue tied baby, a horrible manual breast pump, nipple tears, engorgement, clogged ducts, undersupply, oversupply, another nipple tear, teething, nursing strikes, pumping, hand expressing…all of this and more adds up to a less than ideal nursing situation. Remember when I told you I hated doing math? Well I did some math today and the numbers were frightening, check them out:

Number of hours in a day: 24
Frequency of breastfeeding: At least every 3 hours = minimum of 8 nursing sessions a day
Amount of time spent attempting to breastfeed: anywhere from 10-45 minutes
Amount of time spent pumping after failed breastfeeding attempt: 20-30 minutes
Amount of time spent hand expressing after pumping: at least 15 minutes
Amount of time spent bottle feeding: 10-15 minutes

That’s roughly an hour at minimum each time I feed my son equalling about 8 hours of breastfeeding woe’s a day! They weren’t kidding when they said motherhood was a full time job!

Friends wonder why in the world I have a hard time answering my phone and when I sheepishly explain my situation they almost always call me insane. So why do I do all of this? Why work so hard when things are obviously rougher than rough?

The answer is I don’t really know, I mean I know that “breastfeeding is best”, I know that breast milk is full of anti-bodies, is the perfect nutrition, is great for bonding and can prevent all kinds of cancers and illnesses in both mommy and baby. I also know that there are alternatives like formula, soy milk, even condensed milk has been used as an acceptable supplement. I know that I could move to exclusively pumping, I know that I could do a mixture of breast milk and formula, I know that I have options but for some reason I just can’t let this whole breast feeding thing go.

I also know that there are SO many women out there that have similar stories as mine and not necessarily with just breastfeeding. Some women have a battle to conceive, some have an uphill climb throughout their entire pregnancy, some women have difficult births, tough recoveries, sick children….there are some many incredible hurtles that us mothers face and I think these challenges are what make us a special breed. Once you become a mother you seem to look at all the strong women around you and realize just how powerful and overwhelming this role of motherhood is.

There is a common thread amongst us mothers. When we look into our children’s eyes we without even thinking about it sacrifice ourselves, our bodies, our sleep, our boobs, whatever it is we meet the challenge and we do it with love (most of the time haha!) This post isn’t about patting myself on the back for sticking with it, it’s not a post to whine and complain about how hard I’ve had it (but man it’s been rough) it’s a post about accepting this role as mama, the good and the bad. This post is all about loving the support that this space, Modern Day Moms has created for us mamas. A place to celebrate the good days, share advice to get us through the bad days and high five one another and the things in our lives that make us smile.

So to all you moms out there…here’s a virtual thumbs up for doing all that you do for your little ones, your families and for yourselves. Thank you for being a part of this wonderful Modern Day Moms community and for making our jobs so incredibly fun.

“A mother’s love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.”
-Agatha Christie

** Since I’ve become some what of a boob guru going through all these difficulties I’ll be bringing you some tips and advice I’ve picked up along the way **


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  • Bex

    Thanks so much for sharing this story! I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who had a lot of struggle with breast feeding. It’s pretty obvious that it’s “best”, but it’s not so obvious that it isn’t always easy! Reading stories like this will help me better prepare for next time, both physically and emotionally. Life isn’t always rainbows and unicorns, and I appreciate an honest story! It makes me feel like I’m not alone. Good work for sticking with it too, mama. You deserve a pat on the back and then some.

  • Mary

    whew! I thought that I had it hard, you poor thing. Doesn’t it feel great to know that you stuck to your guns and made it through. My first baby was tongue tied, dislocated jaw, I used the sns for her which kept my milk coming. Otherwise I would have lost my milk supply. With my second he was tongue tied as well. He actually didn’t eat within the first 12 hours after delivery. I should have know then how hard it was going to be. Food strikes like you wouldn’t believe. Oversupply! Who knew there was such a thing? I’m so happy I stuck through it because the bonds with my children are amazing! I love to hear other Peoples struggles because it helps me to know that in my struggles I was not alone. High five back to you!!!

  • Brittany B.

    i like the agatha christie quote.

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